Are Client’s Limitations The Problem? Or That They Believe They’re True?

We human beings are funny creatures.  Just because something arises in our mind – be it a thought or a feeling – we tend to assume it is telling us the truth.

So we accept our thought or emotion as accurate  which closes the door to perusing other possible interpretations to the experience.

This automatic assumption of accuracy leads us to believe the thought or feeling is the truth … and then we act accordingly, displaying behaviors from love and compassion to hate and violence.

People rarely take the time to make a distinction between a thought or feeling being accurate  vs. being valid.  Yet this little moment of inquiry can save oodles of time, drama, and suffering.

file0002125234983Accuracy implies a final truth.  No matter how I look at it, the answer is always the same.  There’s no variation and nothing else could change the fact of it.

Validity implies that if I stood in your shoes, I could also feel or think the same thing because that’s how things actually look from that point of view. 

When you can see things from multiple points of view, you can see for yourself that each viewpoint is indeed valid, but not accurate, or a final truth.

You discover all viewpoints are also incomplete. They lack the whole picture that truth requires by virtue of the fact that viewpoints only reflect the single view that naturally arises from the point where you’re standing.

Change where you’re standing, and your view changes automatically.

This is a powerful understanding to keep in mind, not only for your clients, but also for yourself.

Whether it’s overt or covert, helping your clients expand their perceptual flexibility (freedom to peruse multiple viewpoints) can speed up their ability to release limiting beliefs. This skill will move them forward more efficiently in their exploration of how to better live their lives.

What Can You Do?

If you want to create an immediate sense of trust with your client, ask if they consciously (or intellectually) know that their belief or perceived limitation is untrue, even though they feel  it to be the truth in their body.

When this is the case, you will see your client breath an immediate sigh of relief.  file000999308823You will have hit the nail on the head.

Highlighting this saves your client the embarrassment of having to admit the obvious failure of their intellect’s ability to solve the problem. Important?

Yes. In today’s world, anything making the intellect look lesser than head poo-bah can make us feel stupid, guilty, and even ashamed.

Many clients know that what they bring to a coaching, counseling, or hypnotherapy session is in fact not  the truth.  But that knowledge doesn’t change what they feel in their bodies.

Limiting beliefs like I am weak, a failure, or inadequate will always rule the roost when they feel real.  That feeling of truthfulness makes us believe in our deepest fears rather than who we really are.

Even life experience that disproves a limiting belief can fail to change how we feel.

This is not stubbornness, or stupidity.  It is a testament to the power of the unconscious mind’s commitment to stay with what it believes to be true.

Energy Psychology Tools To The Rescue

To shake the feeling of truthfulness out of a limiting thought or emotion that your client intellectually knows to be untrue, make sure you have a few Energy Psychology tools in your repertoire.  Google ‘energy psychology’ and you’ll find a huge list of things to explore.

bird and cageThese tools can take the sense of truthfulness right out of a limiting thought or emotion. This frees your client to experience a new sense of harmony between their conscious and unconscious minds –  freeing more brushes with the reality of that elusive experience of inner peace.

I’ve written about of few of these tools before, but the simplest are Stress Release, Frontal-Occipital Holding, Tapas Acupressure Technique and Emotional Freedom Technique.  There are lots of options for learning these on-line.

Do yourself and your clients a favor and get them in your tool bag as soon as possible and show your client how to get free of these imprisoning ideas.

It’s frustrating to live with something you know isn’t true, yet feel it wield its power by imprisoning your confidence and holding hostage your freedom to grow and expand.

Enjoy exploring and discovering your own wisdom – and may your journey grant you happiness, peace, and freedom from needless suffering.


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